Who needs cookie cutters when you've got these?

Years ago I swore off making sugar cookies. Too much mess and too much work. I even sold all my cookie cutters at our moving sale two years ago.

Last weekend Roman comes to me and tells me he wants to make "Christmas cookies." Apparently he had done this at preschool and wanted to do it at home. I told him no, that we couldn't make Christmas cookies. "Miss Malia makes Christmas cookies."

Really? Not to be outdone by his teacher crush I said, "Okay, we can make Christmas cookies but we're going to need your Play-doh box." He ran and got the Play-doh box and his toy rolling pin that he got from a birthday party and we made Christmas cookies.

But we didn't frost them. Because that would be going too far.

Thanksgiving is coming up. Is anybody else dreading it like I am?

I can never pay attention long enough to stand and stir.

And this is what I get. It happens all the time.

This is what happens when a two year old eats a bowl of cereal and then takes a swig of bottled water.

Have you ever made chocolate chip cookies

and realized you didn't have any chocolate chips after

you had finished making the cookie dough?

I have.

So there you have it. I made cookies.

Capri loves to wear one of two things. Either her swim suit or her jammies. Lately she's been insisting on wearing the water wings as well. So here's what she typically looks like at dinner time. Wings n all.

Another reason why making dinner sucks

Mother's Day Dinner

Have you ever gotten the feeling from me that I am married to a meat and potatoes kind of guy?  Well that is correct.  Meat and potatoes.  Meat and potatoes.  Meat and potatoes.  Do you get what I am saying?  Only meat and potatoes.  Meat and potatoes.  That's it.  No water.  No fruit.  No salad.  No vegetable.  Happy with meat and potatoes.  Happy with just meat in fact.  The potatoes is just an extra.  So what did John make for my Mother's Day dinner?  You guessed it.  Meat and potatoes.

The Frosted Cherry

The night before Mother's Day I was up late per usual.  I finally went to bed around midnight.  As I laid in bed and my brain was going a million miles an hour, I wondered if I had left my jacket outside.  We had had a garage sale earlier that day and I wore a jacket in the early morning and put the money that I made inside the jacket.  Wouldn't that suck if I left my jacket outside and the money got stolen?  So just in case I had, I went downstairs and checked the front porch for my jacket.  No jacket.   It was inside.  Phew.  

What's this?  I noticed a box next to the door.  A box of cupcakes????  For me?????  Sweet!  I was so excited to see that someone had dropped off a box of cupcakes from The Frosted Cherry on my front porch.  If you've read my earlier posts you know that I have absolutely no self control.  There was no saving these for tomorrow.  I ate one right away.  It was chocolate with strawberry butter cream frosting and a cherry on top.  Yummy.    It dawned on me after I'd eaten one that I should've take a picture of the pretty cupcakes before I ate one.  Oh well.  So I brought the cupcakes inside and took a picture of them in almost full glory.  

I didn't want to be a pig so I wanted maybe five minutes until I ate a second one.  It was a lemon merange pie cupcake and so delicious.  I could have had another one but I decided that I'd wait until it was actually Mother's Day to finish off the rest.  I go to bed thinking of the cupcakes.

Which brings us to the next day.  It's Mother's Day so I absolutely don't move when the kids start waking up.  I'm going to sleep in because it's my day.  Around 9:30 or so (give or take another hour) I get up and go downstairs to see my cupcakes.  Ahhh!  Who ate one of my cupcakes?  Without even asking? And where's my breakfast?  It's Mother's Day.

John was the culprit of the missing cupcake.  Why must I tell him everything?  He should just know me well enough by now to know that I was planning on eating all six of those myself.    Anyway, because I'm nice I decide to share the rest with the kids even though I still want to eat them all myself.   The kids pick out a cupcake and enjoy the sugary goodness.  Well, I guess that means I don't have to make breakfast.

Thanks Holly and Charise for making my Mother's Day extra sweet.  You can count on an order from me for Roman's birthday coming in June.  www.thefrostedcherry.blogspot.com

My Week

Monday--burned the chicken.

Tuesday--burned the popcorn.  Two times.  In a row. 

Wednesday--burned the pizza.

Tried again.

Undercooked it.   Yuck!

MAKING DINNER SUCKS

Remember the red jello and orange salad I made at Christmas?

Well, I thought it was about time I got them out of the outside fridge and threw them away?  What do you think?

Making dinner has sucked more than usual because the kids have been sick.  Bella was sick for a week.  She stayed home from school and everything you have no idea how constrained I'm being right now.  Now I get to spend this week helping her with her 20 pages of school work that she missed.  How fun ::wink, wink::

This week Roman is sick and staying home from preschool.  He is the opposite of Bella when he's sick.  In fact, he likes to tell me that he is NOT sick and that he doesn't have a fever.  I have to tell him, "no, we can't go to the park today" and "no, you're not going to school."

So much face time with my kids has left me feeling BLAH.  I made mac and cheese for dinner tonight.  John had toast with jam and cheese. I know, he's weird huh.  He fixed it himself but at least he never complains.  I am so glad to be married to someone who doesn't expect dinner on the table when he comes home from work.  If I make something great, if I don't, great.  He doesn't really care.  He doesn't care if the house is a mess either.  I'm telling you I have the perfect husband for me.  He's way laid back and happy with whatever.  He even does his own laundry. 

Now on to a different subject.  Tonight I went to Albertson's because tonight was the last night of the stupid cereal sale.  I thought what the heck I'll just go so I don't have to be envious when I hear everyone else bragging about how much cereal they got for $20.  It was also double coupon day so I took three one dollar coupons for three different products.  

Now on to why I hate Albertson's and why I hate couponing.  First of all, it took me forever to decide which coupons to use.  I just kind of chose three foods:  sausage, Rhodes rolls, and cereal.  The cereal coupon was great since I was buying the cereal on sale anyway.  But Albertson's doesn't carry the type of Rhodes rolls that matched the coupon.  Ugh.  So I went looking for the sausage and finally found three, yes only three and they were hidden, Johnsonville sausage links.  They were "on sale" for 2 for $7.  What?  3.50 for a pack of sausage?  The coupon I had was $1 off two so I grabbed two.  I figured I'd pay about 2.50 a piece since the coupon would be doubled and I'd get two bucks off.  Then I found a coupon in my wallet for $1 off two Tree Top juices.  I go over to them and see they are "on sale" for 2.79.  Regular price is 3.79.  Holy crap.  At Winco I typically get my juice for 1.58.  I hate Albertson's and their crappy prices.  So then I get my cereal.  I grab 5 boxes.  Two Raisin Bran and 3 Honey Bunches of Oats with Almonds.  I also get a loaf of bread.  My total is 17.57 and I get a catalina for $5  off my next purchase.  Not too bad but I should have just bought the cereal.  I'll save my coupons for Winco.

When I got home I realized that I forgot to buy more Motrin and Roman is going to need some for tomorrow.  So I run to Winco.  Good ol, dependable Winco.  Thank you Winco for having decent prices CONSISTENTLY.  Sure enough the sausage is 2.78 a pack and the Tree Top juice was 1.88.  

Bottom line--I'm frustrated with couponing.  I found I was spending a lot of money trying to "save" money.  And time.  It sucks up a lot of time.  And who needs that much Pillsbury crap anyway?

Here's my new strategy for saving money.  Every time I go to the store I write down how much I've spent.  A new concept for me since I have NEVER balanced a check book or budgeted.  I know, I'm an idiot.  But in my defense, how do you budget without an income?  The other strategy, this one is also new to me, only buy what you need.  And don't buy three of four just because you like them all.  Just try and pick one.  Ok, I know you can't just pick one because you're mental, but keep it to two.  

The other strategy that I do is I shop without my children.  This isn't so much to save money as it is to save my sanity.  Seriously, I think I have taken Roman and Capri to Winco maybe twice in their lives.   I did take them for the first time ever last weekend and I ended up buying so much junk because I have this habit of saying yes to everything.  Roman asked me yesterday if Capri had a penis and I said yes.  I told you, it's automatic.  I don't think.  I just say yes to everything.  I think it's because Bella trained me this way.  That and I'm stupid.

The other way I try and save money is by stretching out shopping trips and going without for a little while.  Boy did it suck when I was out of hot chocolate for a week.  

I also don't go chasing after good deals.  It's only a good deal if you need it.  Besides, it also messes with the environment to have 100 bottles of shampoo and lotions on your shelf.  I know they were "free" but we need to be careful with our resources.

Last, but not least, I enter blog raffles in hopes of winning something to help us get by.

Occasionally, we have hamburgers at our house. You know the ones I'm talking about. They come wrapped in yellow paper with a little bit of ketchup, a few cut-up onions, a slice of cheese, and one, maybe two, pickles if you're lucky. They also always come with fries. And a toy.

Well, tonight we had a different kind of hamburger. Something I've never had before. A slider. And not just any slider. A big city slider. Compliments of Billy Mays himself and courtesy Miss Emi-kins of Hawaii. I hope she doesn't mind that I gave her that nickname. Because I really like calling her that.

How did you come across such a fine slider station you may wonder? Especially when you are on a permanent spending freeze? Miss Emi-kins hosted a blog raffle after buying her son a Snuggie. She bought two other prizes As Seen On TV to give away in a giant raffle. Mr. Gavin drew my name out first. I couldn't believe it. The odds were nearly impossible. I felt so lucky afterwards that I almost went out and joined another raffle. And bought a lottery ticket.

When it came in the mail, I was so excited to see that Billy Mays had personally autographed it and said, "Congratulations!" Emi must have told him about the drawing.

Today I set about preparing to make sliders for dinner. Oh, I was so excited! I love new kitchen toys. First I washed it in hot, soapy water. Die germs, die.

Then I did this. Don't worry, I didn't touch a thing. It comes with a scoop.

And this. What do you think so far? Impressive?

And this.

Then I finally got around to opening up the instructions.

Um, whoops.
There's an actual recipe in here for how to make these things. Oh well.

Then after a few minutes I wonder if they are done. I put on my magical pot holder also courtesy of Miss Emi-kins. Love ya babe.

Could it really be this easy?

Yes.

Oh Yes!

There are many reasons why I don't BAKE.  

Here are just a few.  I'd rather play with Capri.

Or Roman.
Or Bella.
I'm too busy doing more important things.  (Yes, we made all those).  I can make one for you too, if you pay me.
The kitchen is ALWAYS a mess.  So there's no room to make more of a mess.  (Good strategy, huh.)
But the number one reason why I don't BAKE is:
Because I eat it ALL.  This is a picture of what happens when I get a craving.  Last week I was craving chocolate really bad and the hot chocolate just wasn't cutting it.  I couldn't find any candy bars in the house, believe me I looked everywhere, and we were out of chocolate chips.  We did have a box of ready mix lemon bars so I decided to make those.  And this is what they looked like 12 hours later.  I had eaten the entire pan.  Which screwed me up for the next four days craving all kinds of naughty stuff.  So you see folks, that is why I don't bake.  I have no self control.  None.

Dinner isn't good unless it's full of fat.

A fat-filled dinner tastes good but makes you blow up like a cow

Blowing up like a cow means you no longer fit into your clothes

Buying new clothes gets expensive

Wearing clothes the size of cows means less clothes fit into the washer 

leading to more loads to wash.

Washing more loads of laundry means less time for cooking dinner.

That's why dinner isn't good unless it's full of fat. 

Tonight I am making Basil Chicken.  It's an Olsen favorite.  I'm surprised I haven't blogged about it before.  It's easy.  You put 3 chicken breasts into the crockpot, dump an entire bottle of coleslaw dressing over the chicken,  add some basil that your sister grew in her herb garden with the help of her boyfriend and gave you for Christmas,  duct tape the lid shut, and cook on low for 3 hours.  Serve over white rice since Bella won't eat the brown rice.

If you are looking for the remote, I found it.

For a few years now I've been thinking about making cornbread.  My sister makes it and her family loves it.  I love cornbread too.  I always load up on it whenever we go to Chuck A Rama.  It's like eating healthy cake.  In the past I have bought those little bags of cornmeal thinking that I would make corn bread.  Well, you know me, I never do what I intend to do, so over the years I have thrown out expired corn meal that's never been opened.  

But last week the stars aligned.  I found a recipe for cornbread and a new bag of corn meal in the pantry, Capri was asleep, Roman was playing race cars by himself and the kitchen was fairly clean, so I thought ok, I will give this a try.  I made the corn bread which was actually a lot easier than I thought it would be.  I didn't burn it so that was good.  The only thing was I didn't know what else to make with it.  What goes good with corn bread?  I don't know.  Probably a whole bunch of things but nothing that my family will eat.  

I ended up making chicken and, yeah, it didn't go that great together.  But hey, at least I can say that I have made corn bread now and it turned out pretty good.  The kids weren't goo goo over it but that is to be expected.  My kids don't get excited about any food unless it's chocolate chip cookies.  Then all the sudden they love to eat.  I made sure to eat lots and lots of corn bread that night to make it worth all the effort.

PS  Does anyone feel sorry for me?  I mean, I seriously can't stand this whole dinner thing.  And it doesn't feel like it's ever going to change.  Ugh.

Proof that Roman spits out his food.

I opened the dishwasher and found this the other day. 

The other night I thought I would make Rice a Roni.  Um, whoops.  You would think after burning it so many times in my life that I would learn to pay attention long enough to stand and stir, but no, I always get bored and walk away from the stove, only to remember about it later. Oh crap, I did it again.

Cathy said something once about making Hootenannies for dinner.  I asked her, "What in the heck are Hootenannies?"  German Pancakes, duh.

So I decided to give it a try.  Ya know, mix things up from our everyday, gourmet, three course meals.  The recipe seemed easy enough.  The only hiccup was the fact that I had to remember where I unpacked my blender.  In a small kitchen it didn't take long to find it and I didn't have too much trouble making these.  I didn't burn them and they didn't spill into the oven so that was good.  

Although these Hootenannies are strange looking, I thought they were quite good tasting. However, not all my children agreed.  Roman and Bella did not even try them.  Capri liked them them well enough but John said they weren't very filling.  So there you have it folks, another dinner that sucked.

Today I made ham and those potatoes.  Ya know, those ones with cheese and corn flakes on top?  We also had corn.  Big surprise.  No rolls since I figured we had all the carbs covered with the potatoes.  Here's the report.

What did you make?  Ham, potatoes, corn.

Is that it?  No jello?  No jello.

Did Roman eat it?  Just the ham.

Did Bella eat it?  Actually yes.  After telling me it looked gross of course.

Did Capri eat it?  She loved the potatoes and ham mixed together.

Did it make John sick?  No.

Did you burn anything today?  No.  A fairly successful dinner.  Except for the fact that I put the ham in the crock pot and it didn't fit so I had to put it in the roaster oven and now I have to wash the crock pot and the roaster oven. 

Will you make this again?  Yes, because I love ham.  I'm part pig.